When I was a teenager, I had a really low self-esteem. All the time I would rag on myself about how ugly I was compared to all the other girls in my school. I tried to compensate with other things that usually just blew up in my face. There was no making me happy, no matter who would tell me I was beautiful. This made me fall into many traps set my the male gender. I was a mess. I tried in so many ways to change myself with the hopes of being better. I cut my hair super short, dyed it many different colors, and even tried changing my eye color with contacts. My daddy always tried to talk me out of it by telling me how beautiful I was naturally without all the stuff, but I never believed and it only made me want to do it worse. I have no idea what made my mind think this way, but it did. I had no confidence in myself whatsoever.
Now that I am maturing, I have noticed little things about myself that make me beautiful. Things I have never noticed before, or wanted to notice before. I look in the mirror and think, "dang girl! You got it!" I don't wear makeup everyday. I don't even really do anything with my hair any more honestly- because it is just right the way it is. I am not sure what switch was flipped but the has boosted my confidence within myself. I am kinder to people around me. I feel like I can do more with my life. I feel like a more beautiful person- inside and out.
So I came to the conclusion that beauty is everything, but not in the sense that the world identifies with this phrase. I believe that one's own personal conception of their beauty is everything. I don't mean in a prideful "I am more pretty than you" kinda way, but a "I am more pretty than I think" kinda way. The world shouldn't take away our confidence by making us feel lower than everyone else. We should overcome this feeling and realize who we truly are before we are consumed by hatred and self-pity.
YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL JUST THE WAY YOU ARE!!!
On another note, Seth is on his last week in Casper. He will be back the eighth and will be starting our cabin soon!! We are hoping to be moving in by the end of the year! Woopee!
He also was called as the new Gospel Doctrine teacher in church. Yay! I am so excited for him because he is such a great teacher and it will be a great experience for both of us to get to know the scriptures better!
I am currently getting Raimee's room ready for her to get home because there is only 76 days left until she gets here!!
I also found out that I will be graduating next semester! I will have to take 17 credits to do it but I am going to buckle down and only focus on that! I will have an interdisciplinary associates degree which isn't exactly what I was going for, but I will have a degree and have business classes to help with the ranch.
I started working at the grocery store here in town. It will definitely not be a career but I think it will work for a temporary position. It hasn't been too bad.
Our lives are busy and getting busier so I hope everyone keeps following me on here to see what is going on! See you next week!
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